How many times do you get sad because of the people around you? No matter how happy we are in life, but words or actions of others might make us miserable. Sadly, we all have people in our lives who dislike us or try to put us down. And we cannot avoid them. So to live life happily, you should learn to deal with people who put you down. Because if you don’t, you will never be able to live life to the fullest.
Why People Put You Down?
We shouldn’t get sad when someone intends to hurt or mistreat us. If a person is doing something painful every time they see you, it could be a sign that he is jealous of you. Don’t hold yourself accountable for someone’s behavior with you. Because if you see the same repetitive pattern of behaviors, then maybe there’s something wrong with the other person.
People put you down and be unkind to you because they are dissatisfied with their life, and disrespecting you somehow satisfies them. Another reason could be that they are jealous of you, your accomplishments, your relationships with others, or simply how confident or booming you are in life.
Everybody has their problems in life, and nobody’s life is perfect. You could see a part of his life where he is happy, but nobody knows what he is facing deep down. None of us likes to show others how depressed or sad we are. Stop judging people by their actions because if a person seems happy, it doesn’t mean he is happy.
13 Ways to deal with people who put you down
No matter how happy or prosperous you become in life, you will always have such people around you. They may not be the same, but you meet such people at every stage of life. The best you can do is learn to deal with such people.
Here are 13 ways to deal with people who put you down;
1. Look within yourself
Before we label a person as toxic, we need to see if the problem persists in us. You cannot just leave a person if he is conveying his demands. Most of the time, arguments start when we deny listening to others. Maybe exchanging thoughts and allowing others to speak can help us avoid conflicts and losing a relationship.
Look within yourself and see if you’re doing something wrong. Maybe by digging deep, you can find out the problem. Take the chance if you think there is something you can change to improve their behavior with you. Don’t hesitate to accept your mistakes and apologize because it’s better to sort out things and save your relationship than to lose that person forever.
2. Control your reaction
No one can hurt you if you have the power to control your reaction. Suppose someone said something hurtful to you instead of responding to him in a discourteous way. Pause and think for a moment. Don’t give him the power to make you angry. Control your emotions and prevent yourself from getting angry. To deal with people who put you down, stay quiet and ignore what they say. Don’t take their words too personally. Because that’s what they want, to upset you and ruin your mood. Don’t give them the power to control how you feel.
3. Respond in a respectful way
One of the other ways to deal with people who put you down is by responding politely and respectfully. Listen to their opinion, and then you can excuse them politely and move away. Because the longer you engage with them, the longer you have to listen to their negativity. So the best thing is to reply courteously and move from that place. This could be the best revenge because their motive is to make you feel bad and involve you in a fight with them. And if you stay quiet or reply to them respectfully, they won’t get a chance to speak more.
4. Avoid arguing
Dealing with people who put you down becomes easy when you don’t get into an argument with them. Their ultimate purpose is to hurt you with their words or actions. So arguing with them will allow them to say more bad words to you. Please don’t argue with them because they won’t leave a chance to hurt you more. Because in anger, you might say something that you would regret later. If someone is treating you wrong, you don’t need to treat them the same way. Avoid them completely, so their words don’t stick in your mind.
5. Calm your mind
The best way to deal with people who put you down is the one that saves you from getting depressed. Because whatever you do, the reason is to protect your inner peace. If you’re having trouble forgetting their behavior with you, start with calming your mind. Sit in a tranquil place and enjoy a cup of tea/coffee. You can also spend some time in nature and relax your mind. Meditation has proven to calm your mind, allowing you to get rid of anxious thoughts.
6. Detach yourself emotionally
To deal with people who put you down, detach yourself emotionally, if not physically. If you’re stuck in a situation where you cannot distance them, emotionally detach yourself from them. Don’t let them come close to you; try to avoid interacting with them at all costs. Practice forgiveness if you can, at least for yourself. It can prevent a lot of stress and anxiety from building up due to these people.
7. Preserve your integrity
Preserve your integrity when dealing with people who put you down. Don’t treat them the way they treat you. If they’re showing hatred towards you, then that’s their problem. Focus on yourself and how you can prevent your mental health from being affected. There’s always a reason behind a person’s aggressive behavior. You never know what he might be going through, and fighting with him will only make your life miserable.
8. Hold space for yourself
Sometimes people around us affect us so much that we forget our true purpose. We’re always thinking about how we’ll respond to this person if he says or does something terrible to us. Don’t let yourself be involved in the hatred towards people who put you down, that you forget your life’s purpose. And every area of your life starts getting affected. Hold space for yourself, and look for things that make you happy. Because if you’re really getting hurt, pain, and anxious feelings, then it means they were successful in their purpose. That’s what they want. Self-care always comes first, and we cannot neglect it.
9. Set healthy boundaries
When you set healthy boundaries, you prioritize your feelings. Accepting your feelings allows you to make better decisions for yourself. When suffering, we often try to avoid all our negative emotions. But it keeps us overthinking and questioning our worth. Setting boundaries will also help you to know when to walk away.
You cannot just put aside your feelings and how others impact your life. You need to set boundaries so that not everyone can come and attack you with their words. Take care of yourself because it’s necessary for your physical and mental health.
10. Consult with a trustworthy friend
One of the other ways to deal with people who put you down is by seeking help from a trustworthy friend. Sometimes no matter how much you effort you put in, you can’t help yourself. Sometimes, the wound is so deep that it causes a scar on your heart. Don’t take an offense so personally that it starts to affect your health. Tell your family members or close friends, and lift the burden off your shoulders. You feel relieved when you discuss your matters and get a good piece of advice.
11. Learn from your experiences
Every toxic person you meet in life leaves you with a lifelong lesson. None of us can avoid people who put us down, but we can learn lessons from our experience to avoid repeating our mistakes. One of the mistakes we make when dealing with people who put us down is that we try to ruin their image in front of people. You don’t need to tell everyone what they did to you. Because if you do that, people might consider you problematic. Nobody cares who did what. Learn from your circumstances and avoid spreading the news.
12. Let it go
Holding on to past events only causes us pain. If you keep visiting your scars, you will never allow them to heal. Dealing with people who put you down is challenging if you don’t know how to let go. You don’t have to overthink how a person treated you or how much you suffer because of him. Focus on getting back on track when you feel lost and moving toward your dreams. Such people could become a barrier to success if you don’t let them go. Just forget the past and move on. Don’t stay there, and be kind to yourself for your mistakes. We all make mistakes in life, and that’s ok. Forgive yourself and those who put you down. Stop limiting yourself by focusing on such people; aim high and achieve your goals.
13. Change your outlook
When we figure out someone is always trying to put us down, we create a negative image of this person. We’re always alert if he does something to us and starts thinking negatively about him. Why do we focus on this person so much? It happens because he is taking most of our attention. Even when he isn’t trying to hurt us, we assume all of his actions to be against us. If a co-worker is talking to someone, we think he must be saying bad things about us. Just because he dislikes you or puts you down doesn’t mean he is always talking about you.
You need to change your outlook for the sake of your peace. You won’t be able to concentrate on your work if you’re overthinking every little thing. In addition, you will get mentally disturbed and feel unhappy. Don’t let such people take away peace and contentment from your life. Focus on what brings you happiness, and stick to it.
The Final Word
Dealing with people who put you down can be difficult, especially when facing them daily. But you will frequently suffer if you keep getting sad over everything they say or do. And the solution isn’t to run away from them. Even if they’re around you, pretend like you don’t see them. Every time they come to tease or taunt you, smile and move away. If you control your reaction and avoid arguing with them, they will leave insulting and disrespecting you. They intend to leave you troublesome and annoyed, and if you start acting like their behavior doesn’t affect you, they naturally distance themselves. To deal with people who put you down, learn to respond politely, and avoid arguments with them.
